Parent Care

In order to take care of your new baby, you must take care of yourself. So, here's a checklist of things you will need after baby comes.

Time With Your Baby - Be sure to have enough time with your baby so you can get to know each other and enjoy each other.

Rest - Fatigue is a major problem new parents face. The following is a list of chores that should be done by someone else the first two weeks at home.

• Laundry
• Meals
• Dishwashing
• Cleaning house
• Grocery shopping

If possible, have the following help on hand:

• Your mother or mother-in-law
• Other family or friends
• Hired help

Healthy Food - Have healthy food on hand at all times so you are not tempted to eat unhealty food when you are hungry. We recommend that you:

• Prepare double portions of your favorite dishes and freeze half.
• Ask friends or family to prepare a home-cooked meal instead of buying a baby gift.
• Order take-out meals from restaurants several times a week.
• Learn to prepare several quick and easy meals.

Support From Others - It's important to have support from others who understand what you are going through.

• List three people who have children who you consider real confidantes and with whom you could share openly.
• List two places where you could go to be with other parents of young children.

Time To Yourself - While taking care of your new baby, there may be times when you cannot leave home. Think of at least two things that you would miss the most if you could not leave home. Discuss this with your partner, and figure out how to bring these things into your home.

Time For Each Other - Happy parents are good parents. It's important to have a strong emotional bond with your partner. Think of things that you would like your partner to do so that you know (s)he cares and discuss them with your partner. For example:

• Say "I love you."
• Give unexpected hugs.
• Say "Our baby is lucky to have such a good dad (mom)."
• Bring me a bouquet of flowers from the grocery store.
• Brag about me in front of others.
• Surprise me with a small gift now and then.
• Make a date to go out with each other.

Make sure that you have a babysitter that you can rely on. Continue to make monthly dates with each other. You were together before the baby was born, make sure you are stay together as your baby grows up.

Beating the Baby Blues

New mothers and fathers will experience a whirlwind of emotions following the birth of a baby. Many of these feelings are normal and should not cause any alarm. However, if any emotions begin to concern you or if some feelings grow in intensity, you should seek support.

Many hormonal changes take place in a woman’s body after the birth of a baby. One of the most dramatic changes occurs with the hormone estrogen. Changes in estrogen can affect a woman’s mood. These hormonal changes can contribute to making you feel weepy and sad and may cause the baby blues.

Symptoms of the Baby Blues

A majority of new moms and dads experience the baby blues. These feelings usually start on the second or third day after the birth and last around 10 days.

Mom may have:

• Crying spells
• Mood swings
• Anxiety
• Loneliness
• Decreased sex drive
• Lack of confidence in mothering ability
• Fear of being alone

Dad may have:

• Angry outbursts
• Sulking
• Anxiety
• Lack of confidence in fathering ability

What to Do

Share with each other how you really feel. Help each other, if you can. If you need more help, share with supportive family and friends how you really feel. Ask for help. If the baby blues last longer than 10-14 days, talk to your doctor.

Symptoms of Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression occurs in about 10 percent of new mothers. It may start as early as the second or third day after birth or take several weeks to develop. Many of the symptoms of the baby blues are present, but they are more intense.

Make a mental note of the following symptoms that apply to you:

• Loss of appetite
• Dislike or fear of touching the baby
• Inability to sleep even when the baby sleeps
• Feelings of hopelessness or loss of control
• Overconcern or no concern at all about the baby
• Little or no concern about own appearance
• Fear of being alone

If you have several of these sypmtoms, you may be experiencing postpartum depression. This is a treatable illness caused by hormonal changes. Call your obstetrician. When caught early, postpartum depression can be cured with medication and counseling. If the depression is severe or if treatment is delayed, temporary hospitalization may also be necessary.

Symptoms of Postpartum Psychosis

A more severe condition is known as postpartum psychosis. This occurs in about one percent of mothers.

The symptoms of postpartum psychosis include:

• Hallucinations
• Delusions
• Irritability
• Disorganized behavior

Extreme cases of postpartum psychosis include:

• Suicidal thoughts
• Wanting to cause harm to the baby

Times of feeling anxious, irritable, or tearful may be mixed with times of feeling well. If you have these any of these symptoms, call your doctor or Crisis Line immediately.

How Family and Friends Can Help

Ask your health care provider for information about postpartum depression so that you will know how to help. Reassure the postpartum mother that this is a common reaction, she is not crazy, and that you will be there when she needs you. Make sure the postpartum mother keeps appointments with her health care providers. Go with her, if needed. If the postpartum mother is displaying signs of postpartum depression or psychosis, do not leave her alone, or alone with the baby, until her health care provider has said that it is safe.

If You Need Help

• Crisis Line (The Phone)
  225-924-3900
  1-800-437-0303
• Woman’s Hospital’s Social Services
  225-924-8456
• Parent Helpline
  1-800-348-KIDS (5437)
• Or, contact the nearest hospital emergency room.